The Hottie in Hotlanta

New Website

2009-01-30T12:17:00.000-08:00

Hey, remember when I used to post videos on here? Me neither.

I stopped because I have been working on putting up a real, legitimate website. So instead of coming to this little ol' blog, go here if you want to see my latest and greatest video works:

www.theysaybuild.com

Enjoy, and send people you know to this site, especially those that say, "Hey, do you know anyone that can make videos?"

Number 42: "Overcranked Fights: Episode 2"

2008-09-28T20:19:00.000-07:00

Overcranked Fights: Episode 2 (Click the link for HD)

Number 41: "Cracked"

2008-09-24T20:34:00.000-07:00

Cracked (Click link for HD)

Number 40: "Overcranked Fights: Episode 1"

2008-09-21T05:50:00.000-07:00

Overcranked Fights: Episode 1 (Click link for HD)

Number 39: "Global Missions Room"

2008-09-17T06:53:00.000-07:00

Global Missions Room Entrance Video (Click the link for HD)

Number 38: "Sam the Dog"

2008-09-07T05:04:00.000-07:00

Sam the Dog from Justin Metcalfe on Vimeo.

Go here if you want to see the HD version.

Number 37: "Lift the Savior Up"

2008-08-11T12:00:00.000-07:00

Motion lyric video for the upcoming AGAPE concert at Mount Pisgah UMC.

Number 36: "Celebrate Recovery"

2008-07-30T07:46:00.000-07:00

My first video in HD (though, obviously, this web version is not) for the church. The song, "Find", is by the ever brilliant Phillip Rice off of his album, "Intimacy With Jesus in the Quiet Places".

Number 35: "Je T'aime"

2008-07-04T15:58:00.000-07:00

Our first of (hopefully) many short films for the summer. This one is inspired by the Andrew Bird song, "Yawny at the Apocalypse".

Number 34: "New Life Ranch Family Camps"

2008-06-08T18:10:00.000-07:00

Just couldn't bear the thought of not somehow being involved here during the summer:

Number 33: "I WAS RIGHT"

2008-05-26T19:24:00.000-07:00

Number 32: "Love to me is like a summer day"

2008-05-23T11:02:00.000-07:00

See if you can spot the Scrubs-esque transition:

Number 31: "Back in T-Town"

2008-05-12T18:28:00.000-07:00

I was back in Tulsa this past weekend to celebrate the nuptials of my dearly beloved friends Doug and Danae. It was a splendid wedding and good to see all the Oklahoma people I haven't seen in a while. Somehow I failed to take any pictures of the wedding, but I did go on a scavenger hunt with my brother, so here are a couple from that, as well as 2 really creepy portraits:

Number 30: "The new camera"

2008-05-03T15:04:00.000-07:00

So I just bought my brother's digital SLR so that I can now be a fancy photographer. After literally spending hours looking at these photo's I have decided one thing:

I will never take a picture of a flower (or at least, never take a picture and then post it). I think that at least half of the photo's posted on that site are of flowers. It is not that I don't think flowers are pretty, it just seems kind of cheap to me, taking a picture of something that already does most of the work for you to look pretty. I imagine that when God goes scrolling through these digital picture albums and sees all these flowers He starts thinking to himself, "Hey! I remember creating that. Why the heck do they get all the credit for that picture?" But then again, I guess He could say that same thing about taking pictures of humans.

So, with that in mind, here is the first picture I completed:

Bear in mind that the upload of this diminished the quality of this photo. Go here for a truer representation.

Number 29: "Babies always make good videos."

2008-04-25T12:25:00.000-07:00

A video for this Sunday's sermon:

Number 28: "It makes me want to shovel something"

2008-04-16T16:20:00.001-07:00

2 observations from the day:

OBSERVATION 1:
Most days I go to lunch around 1 and stop by the mailbox to pick up my mail. Sometimes the mailman is still there, and it makes me really uncomfortable. This is why:

Right next to the mailboxes is a big trash can that everyone throws their junk mail into. Usually I throw mine in there as well, except when the mailman is present. I just feel like if I was to take the mail from my box and then turn around and put it directly into the trash it would be like an insult to his profession. I wonder if sometimes he thinks to himself, "Maybe I should cut out the middle man and put this stuff where it is going to end up anyway....I hate my job."

So today I took the junk mail with me and waited until I was home to throw it away.

OBSERVATION 2:
Usually when I am buying things with my credit card the person behind the counter doesn't check my ID. But today the cashier did, and we had a fun conversation as a result:

Cashier: An Oklahoma license, huh?
Me: Yup. Have you ever been to Oklahoma?
Cashier: Nope. I don't really know anything about it.
Me: Yeah, there is not much of a reason to go there.
Cashier: It is fun to say, though. Oh-Kulah-Ho-Ma.
Me: Yeah...
Cashier: It makes me want to shovel something.
Me: Okay...can I have my license back?

Number 27: "A Very Video Update"

2008-04-11T08:48:00.000-07:00

Haven't posted many video's as of late, so here are a couple:

Number 26: "Eating chlorotabs like Skittles, or, Better Jump on the bandwagon before it fills up."

2008-04-07T14:35:00.000-07:00

When I lived in Oklahoma I thought I had bad allergies. But then I moved to Atlanta and realized I have horrible allergies. Pollen moves through the air as thick as smog, covering everything with a yellow green film. It really is quite remarkable, waking up to find the once black streets now a strange shade of green. So I knock back allergy medication like it is candy and pray that the summer heat gets her and kills everything.

But in better news:

A few months ago my dear friend Bailey and I decided that we needed an American League Baseball team to cheer for. We quickly decided against the natural choices of the Red Sox and Yanks, instead opting for a more unlikely team to cheer for: the Tampa Bay Rays.

In the 1o or so years of their existence the Rays have never even come close to winning half their games. They are perpetually the worst team in baseball, a joke of an organization whose only real news has been whether or not to keep the "Devil" in front of "Rays" (which they decided to drop this spring).

But there is hope. Since Bailey and I have started cheering for the Rays they went 18-8 in Spring Training, and are currently ahead of both the Yanks and BoSox in the A.L. East. Granted, this is more than likely to change, but we are not cheering for a division title, or even a playoff berth. Nay, we are rooting for a winning season, a season that has more wins than losses, or heck, even a season with as many wins as losses!

Oh, and I promise to put up another video soon.

Number 25: "And the home of the Braves"

2008-03-29T10:58:00.001-07:00

While I am not necessarily an Atlanta Braves fan, the mere fact that I finally live in a city with a Major League Baseball team has me acting really irrationally.

Yesterday my friend Andy and I decided to buy a "Season Ticket Flex Plan" for the Braves 2008 season. It's a pretty sweet deal, about 15 bucks a ticket for 17 games, the first one being this Thursday. We decided to buy every Thursday game they had at home, since that is the start of both of our weekends. Then we added in a couple of others (he is a Cubs fan, so we're going to that whole series) when we thought the game would be good.

Hopefully my work schedule won't give me too much of a hassle so I can go to the majority of the games I paid for.

Number 24: "Would you like to join our cause?"

2008-03-24T15:57:00.001-07:00

For some reason today was "Petition Justin to Join our Cause" day.

It started this morning with some cleverly disguised Jehovah's Witnesses (dressed as an elderly woman and a younger woman in a peacoat) who held my attention long enough to hand me some literature enlightening me on such topics as "Why do Jehovah's witnesses not use the cross in worship?" and "The Mystery of the Monkey's on the Rock".

After they left I realized that I knew next to nothing about their beliefs, so I did some research, using the Internets most reliable source for information, Wikipedia. Some interesting (and sometimes creepy) things I learned along the way:

1) Rather than just Jesus ruling over the Earth after the Apocolypse, He will be joined by the 144,000 elect, mentioned in Revelations.

2) The Second Coming of Christ actually already took place in 1914, but it was done so invisibly in heaven, and Armageddon is currently occurring.

3) Blood is not to be eaten, sucked, stored or transfused.

4) Only they follow the true religion as commanded by God, and all other religions, including Christianity, are false religions that will be destroyed during the End Times.

Well that's fun...

Secondly, today as I was getting of my car in the Blockbuster parking lot I noticed to people dressed in military uniforms. I had this sense that as soon as they saw me they would try and cajole me into signing up, or even worse, giving them my phone number or email address so that they could perpetually hound me with "a great opportunity". And that sense proved correct. Here is conversation:

Military Guy (MG): Well hey, it looks like I am on time.

Me: Excuse me?

MG: You called me and told me to meet you here, right?

Me: Uh, sure I guess...

MG: Hey, I am Sargent Mike. Have you ever considered joining the Army?

Me: Yeah, I considered it, and decided against it.

MG: Well, you know, you can do it part time, work on the weekends.

Me: Oh, well I work for a church, so weekends are no good for me.

MG: Well, they would be able to work with you on a schedule. Here is my card, give me a call sometime so we can talk about some opportunities for you.

Me: Okay, I will.

Alright, so that is a lie. I won't. But I really wanted to get inside and rent a movie, so I said what I had to.

Number 23: "For Us By Us"

2008-03-13T16:36:00.001-07:00

This is a conversation I had with a guy who moved from Kenya not more than 3 months ago:

Me: So Josh, what is the strangest thing about living in America.

Josh: Oh, I don't really feel like anything is that strange. I visited once before I moved, so it is not that weird.

Me: Oh, huh, nothing?

Josh: Well, I noticed something weird about you.

Me: Really? Well, I guess that is not that hard to believe. What is it?

Josh: You don't really wear any name brand clothing.

Me: Oh yeah, it's just not really my thing.

Josh: You should buy some FUBU. Do you know FUBU?

Me: Yes...

For those of you that don't find this conversation comical, well, ask someone who knows what FUBU is.

And now, a video:
(Short preface; Project Andrew is the current sermon series where congregates are encouraged to write on a card the names of people they will pray for/invite to church.)

Number 22: "The whole bag"

2008-02-29T11:38:00.000-08:00

The other day I thought I would be a good master and buy my dog a bag of those chewy bacon-flavored treats. He was ecstatic, as I assumed would be the case, as I opened the bag and handed him one of the delicious delicacies. Then, I made a mistake; I put the bag on the counter.
This is why that was a mistake:

For as perfect a dog Sam is, he has one obnoxious fault. Whenever I leave, if provided the opportunity, he will knock over the trash and tear into it, spreading waste all throughout my apartment. The first time this happened I was bewildered, considering he had never exhibited such behavior. I figured a harsh reprimanding would cease any further delinquency. Unfortunately, later that very same night, he committed the same felony. So I, being somewhat more intelligent than a canine, came up with a solution and moved the trash into the pantry closet. Problem solved.

That is, until I left the bag of treats on the counter. When I came back from whatever crazy club it is I frequent (it probably involved showering its patrons with soap suds at the midnight hour), I saw the bag torn to shreds lying in the living room.

And now, a completely unrelated video, starring Miss Tiffany Shirah, of Mount Pisgah Children's Ministry fame:

You'll be glad to know this one elicited tears from several members of the worship planning team. Tears=good video=my employment is safe for another week. Not that I work on a merit based contract.

Number 21: "Anyone know where I can get some of them 'roids?"

2008-02-20T18:27:00.001-08:00

I have been playing a lot of tennis lately. Actually, I have been exercising a lot; running 2 miles at least 4 times a week, and playing tennis about 3 times a week.

Good for me, right?

Sure, except for the fact that I am turning into an old man. I'm not sure what is the problem yet, but my right knee is killing me. Alright, killing me might be a little hyperbolic, but it does give me some troubles while running, especially on hard surfaces.

So, in light of my recent injuries, I've been thinking, what would the pro's do? HGH. They seem to be all the rage these days, so I need to know where to get some.

For your help in this matter I present to you this video:

(Small preface: for those of you not familiar with Atlanta, MARTA is the public rail system.)

Number 20: "It looks like I cut my own hair."

2008-02-17T20:19:00.001-08:00

Ironically, I think the trash beard actually helps.

Number 19: "I think I was a boyscout for like 3 weeks"

2008-02-07T10:56:00.000-08:00

Thanks to the Patriots pathetic showing in the Superbowl I can no longer brag to my future children about being alive during a record setting season in football, thus meaning that they won't love me as much, thus meaning that I will resent them, thus meaning that they will be sent down a spiraling path of drugs and partying during high school. Maybe if the Patriots knew how much was riding on that game they would have tried a little harder.

Or, as this video I am about to show you exemplifies, I can just put them through Boy and Girl Scouts and they will turn out fine:

If you will notice, I did a much better job with the blue screen this time around, though if you tried hard enough you could see some issues with the edges.

Number 18: "I don't care what you say, she is a real girl"

2008-02-03T11:38:00.000-08:00

Ask me how much I care about the Super Bowl? Very little. If I have to pick a team it would be the Patriots, just so I can say to my kids, "Hey guys, you know, I saw the year the Patriots go 19-0", and they will respond, "Wow Dad, you really are so manly for caring about football. We respect you for that."

With that said, here is a little skit I did for this Sunday:

Fortunately due to the high compression of the video, thus destroying the quality of the video, you can't really tell how bad the blue screening is. We don't have a very good system set up for lighting yet, so trying to effectively blue screen someone is a cumbersome affair. Regardless, the congregation seemed to enjoy it, and I am sure that was due to my awesome cameo.

And no, I haven't forgotten; here is my vote for Best Comedy of 2007:

I could have gone the hipster route and given this award to Juno, but the main character really annoyed the trash out of me. She reminded me of this girl I went to college with, and she really annoyed the trash out of me. But I was glad to see that Micheal Cera redeemed himself from his awful choice of script and character in Superbad (which, coincidentally, won an award for Superbad Movie of 2007).

But there was one movie made in 2007 that completely blew my mind:

"Lars and the Real Girl"

Sometimes I pathetically forget how brilliant an actor Ryan Gosling is. Without being pretentious or contrived he completely convinced me that he was in love with a mail-order doll. And (without offering too much of a spoiler to those of you who are going to see this movie later), I was nearly moved to tears at the end when he lost her. That's right, I almost cried for the sake of a doll.

Number 17: "I try my best not to be melodramatic"

2008-01-26T10:08:00.000-08:00

Ready to find out my pick for Best Drama of 2007? Well stick around after this short commercial break:

I did this video for an upcoming sermon, so you are getting a special sneak peak (well, assuming you read this before tomorrow, the 27th).

Okay, I don't really feel like dilly-dallying today, so I'll just get right to my pick for

Best Drama of 2007
I really thought that this award was going to go to "There Will Be Blood", but I was vastly unimpressed. Sure, Daniel Day Lewis can create a character like few other, but I didn't even think he was the best actor in this film. The teenage preacher, played by Paul Dano, was easily my favorite character, as I found him to be absolutely convincing and terrifying. Part of the problem I had with this film is actually not an internal problem, but that fact that it was hyped by too many writers as a masterpiece, building up my expectations too high. But even still, it just didn't leave me thinking about anything afterwards.

Until yesterday I had decided that this award was going to "Micheal Clayton". I thought this was a well executed and acted political thriller, but I still was having a hard time calling this my favorite drama of the year. It was kinda going to win by default. But then, I watched a movie yesterday that changed everything:

"Away From Her"
This movie was stunningly well written, acted, and edited. This story was terrifyingly compelling, the actor were 100 percent believable, and the non-continuity in the editing made me giddy.
For those of you that don't know the story, here's a nutshell:
A husband has to come to terms with the fact that his wife of 40+ years has Alzheimer's and has decided to check herself into a nursing home/clinic. He is devastated by the fact that he is quickly fading from her mind, and this movie tells the story of his coping with the loss of those memories they share.
I found this story "terrifyingly compelling" on several levels. First, I pray to God that this does not happen to me. I can't imagine loving someone who doesn't remember that they feel the same way.
Second, this movie reminded me of something that happened when I was a kid.
When I was about 13 my neighbor shot his wife and then shot himself. He left a note saying that the reason he did so was because you was developing Alzheimer's and he couldn't stand to see her suffer.
Now, I am by no means condoning his actions, but this film made me understand why he would feel such desperation. But this film also showed what it means to truly love someone with this disease, even as difficult as demonstrating what that love may be.

Up Next: Best Comedy

Number 16: "Well that is just dog-gone funny"

2008-01-20T13:22:00.000-08:00

So I am finally going to post my favorite movies of 2007...sorta. Since there are a couple I am still deciding on, I decided to break it up, Acadamy Awards style...sorta. I'll probably either make up a couple of my own categories or amend others.

But before I do that, some other news:

Wanna see a funny picture?

Check out those hott legs. I am pretty sure I wouldn't have been able to wear those at my highschool; would've broken some sort of dress code or something. Why the short shorts? Well, 2 reasons:

1: I decided to join my apartment complexes tennis team. After having played ultimate frisbee the other day, and running out of breath to the point of nausea after only running the field twice, I decided it was time to get into shape. I watched the team play today and can safely say that they suck. Bad. But that's okay, because I am a little rusty, considering that the last time I really played was in high school.

2: Despite my hatred for doing so, I have taken up running again. But this time it is out of necessity. Why?

He is 8 and probably the perfect dog for me at my time in life. He literally follows me around the apartment and does just about whatever I want.

Alright, so finally, here begins the list of Best Movies of 2007. Up first:

Best Musical
I am pretty excited by the fact that musicals are making a resurgence. They are a bit of a guilty pleasure for me, thought the movie adaptations of today don't nearly match those of their heyday. "Sweeney Todd" had a pretty good soundtrack, but overall I just didn't like the movie all that much. Johnny Depp played his one character (oh, you know, the trashy reject that loves to call everyone "love"), Tim Burton tried too hard to make the film dark (I hear the Broadway version is more of a comedy; this was not. At all.), and there was just too much blood for the sake of blood. And there was "Hairspray", which I had little to no desire to see.
And the award goes to...

"Once"
This is hardly a musical in the traditional sense, and some may argue that it is not a musical at all, but instead people playing music on camera. But those people would be wrong, and probably haven't even seen the movie, which they should go do immediately. What this movie lacks in plot, story, character development...well, lets be honest it's pretty poorly produced, it makes up for 100 fold in heart and beauty. The music carries this film, and it is gorgeous. Not only is this one of my favorite films of the year, its soundtrack also found its way into my top albums of the year (though I forgot to mention it in my previous post; not sure how that happened).

Up next: Best Drama.

Number 15: "Look what I finally posted"

2008-01-10T11:23:00.001-08:00

I realize that I promised my next post would involve my pick for the best movies in 2007, but I need to hold off until after Friday. That is when I plan to see "There Will Be Blood", and I am anticipating that it will make the list.

So in the meantime I will fulfill another promise I made a long time ago. Here are 3 more videos I did for the church:

Sorry that these are such poor quality, but it would take to long to load the larger files.

And I realize that these aren't that spectacular, but expect something other than short little ads soon. I should have some cool interviews and skits to post in the next month or so, so check back for those.

Number 14: "The things that dominated my eardrums"

2008-01-05T10:33:00.000-08:00

This last year I made it a point to start exploring the sounds of local artists, since I am finding it increasingly important to support the art of those in my area. So instead of doing a strictly "Best Albums of 2007" (though I will get to that in a second, I decided to start with:

The Best Local Artists You Probably Wish You Knew Before They Got Huge

Well, I must preface this list by saying that "local" means the Oklahoma/Mid-America region, since that is where I lived for the majority of 2007. However, as fate would have it, one of my favorite bands of the year, local or not, also happens to be from Atlanta, so I'm gonna go ahead and sneak it into this list. So here goes:

Samantha Crain, "The Confiscation EP"

She achieved what I am always looking for in a song: layers. This is about the only thing that attracts me to a song. The are just lots of sounds buried underneath, so there is much more to discover after the cursory listen draws you in.
http://samanthajocrain.com

The Neighborhood, "Our Voices Choked With Fireworks"
The first time I heard this album I was literally gushing with pride. This is due in part to the fact that I was in a cabin with Phillip Rice and Eric Mai in the 7th grade, but due more in part to the fact that I found it hard to believe that this was their first full length record. This album has a maturity to it's sound unmatched by most bands that have several albums out.
http://www.theneighborhoodlovesyou.com/

Ben Rector, "Twenty Tomorrow"
Can you say good songwriter? Good songwriter. There is a reason this guy won the John Lennon Songwriting Award a couple of years ago, because he knows how to put lyrics on paper like we all wish we could. I am really looking forward to his second effort, because I think he will probably let loose on the piano, like I saw him hint at in concert.
Another reason this album is cool: Chris Wylie plays drums. He has a metronome for an internal clock, so he can move the rhythm however he feels like.
http://www.myspace.com/benrector

Lionhead, "The Small Station EP"
One day my friend Jacob Wright gave me his EP after class one day to listen to. I wish I could explain better why I find these songs so attractive, but I can't. All I know is a couple of them found their way into my "Most Listened To" list on Itunes. And thats a hard list to make.
http://myspace.com/lionheadmusic

Manchester Orchestra, "Like a Virgin Losing a Child"
This is the Atlanta band sneaking it way into my "local" list, which again, I don't feel bad putting here, since I live in Atlanta now.
Not only is this one of my favorite local albums of the year, it might even be my favorite all-encompassing album of the year. I probably listened the the song "Colly Strings" 1000 times over the course of the year, because it describes the entire gamut of the emotions involved in a relationship. So no matter where you are, you can relate.
http://www.themanchesterorchestra.com/

Okay, now briefly, The Other Albums That Dominated My Speakers This Year. Feel free to tell me I am wrong:

Andrew Bird, "Armchair Apocrypha": Sad fact: I didn't discover this album until November.
Iron & Wine, "The Shepherds Dog": Now people that hate lo-fi can enjoy the brilliance of Sam Beam.
Radiohead, "In Rainbows": Please stop comparing this to their other albums and take it as an individual entity.
Feist, "The Reminder": I played this album non-stop from May to September. Literally.

Up next: Top Movies of 2007

Number 13: "And a happy New Year to you too, fish"

2008-01-02T16:42:00.000-08:00

The last three New Years, this is what I did:

2007: Went to see "Stranger Than Fiction" by myself, and then fell asleep before the ball drop.
2006: Hung out with Bailey in Shawnee and played Trivial Pursuit. We forgot to watch the ball drop.
2005: Hung out at my house by myself and fell asleep before seeing the ball drop.

Needless to say, they were all lame.

So this year, I resolved to do something to make up for it. I had no idea what I was going to do, just something spectacular that would make up for all the previous years lameness. Fortunately I have a friend, Allison Campbell, with awesome parents who own some condos at Hilton Head Beach. It was a pretty nice condo with a private beach not 5 minutes away, and the weather just about perfect; well, not for swimming, but I'll talk about that later.

So I hung out with about 8 people, had dinner, played Apples to Apples, and actually watched the ball drop. Then we thought it would be a fun idea to go to the beach, which is when I was struck with an idea for how to make up for my lackluster previous New Years: I jumped into the Atlantic Ocean at 12:33ET on 1/1/08. It was cold. Real cold. And salty.

And I would like to dedicate my jump into the ocean to three very special friends, JD, Nathan, and Chad. And the reason for the dedication is this: my freshman year we all took a trip to California for Spring Break. Part of our trip involved an expedition to the ocean, where JD and Nathan decided it would only be appropriate to take a dip in the frigid waters, while Chad and I wussed out and sat on the bench. So for myself and Chad, I jumped in the ocean.

In other, pressing, news: Remember my trip to Kenya? Well in case you haven't heard, due to some shady politics there have been some massacres going on. A church full of people was burned down in Nairobi (the city I am supposed to visit), and the streets are filled with mobs carrying machetes. Um, terrifying.

I haven't officially heard that this trip is cancelled, but I can't imagine that the political unrest will resolve itself in the next month. Which really sucks, because I was quite looking forward to taking my first trip out of the country. But I am sure that something else will come up.

Number 12: "A very sad edit"

2007-12-28T06:46:00.000-08:00

Well, it looks as though Pattycake will not be coming to my home. This morning I got a call from the organization I was adopting from telling me that due to her frightful nature that they didn't think she would work out in my apartment. They tried twice to take her out on a leash to use the bathroom, but she couldn't do it, since she was normally used to just running around outside. So while I am a little dissapointed, its probably better off, because now I don't have to worry about paying my apartment exorbitant amounts of money to replace the carpet. Plus, I decided that I would really like a dog to go on runs with me, which Pattycake would have never done. And Pattycake really is the worst name I have ever heard for a dog.

Oh well, so the search continues.

Number 11: "I now know the truth"

2007-12-27T20:10:00.000-08:00

I learned a very important truth this Christmas while celebrating said holiday with my friend Jody's family: Though I have thought so all my life, I am NOT from the South. While people in Oklahoma or Tulsa tend to believe this is truth, it is simply not the case. I always thought that Paula Dean (of Food Network fame) was just exaggerating her "Southerness" for the camera, but I learned that that is really how people from the South are. They love butter and mayonnaise and casseroles and gossip and strange remedies for maladies involving whiskey and lemon juice and bratty-but-cute kids with thick southern accents and listening to Elvis sings Christmas. I thought these things only existed in the movies. Also, I met the funniest old woman alive, complete with red satin running suit and a brand new Polaroid camera. Yes, you read that right, she took all sorts of pictures with this archaic piece of technology and "shaked it like a polaroid".

In other, more exciting news, tomorrow morning at 11 I will be the proud owner of my first dog. Currently her name is Pattycake, but that certainly must change. I don't know that I can think of a worse name for a dog. Any suggestions for a name? She is a Labrador Retriever, but she looks like she might also have some Chow in her. She's two years old, 25 pounds, and the shiest dog I have ever encountered. It took me 30 minutes and 4 treats just to get her to let me pet her. So its probably going to be a long and arduous couple of weeks getting her acquainted to me. But I saw her open up around the people she was comfortable with, and when she does with me I imagine she will be the perfect companion.

And more exciting news: this February I will be making my first trip out of the country. For the church I am going to Kenya to take some video to make a promotional advertisement for the youth who are taking a mission trip there during the summer. So be expecting a support letter from me.

So, I'll post pics/video of my to-be-named dog soon. Until then, let Jesus love you, and then love others in return.

Number 10: "Christmas time is supposed to be here"

2007-12-21T15:16:00.000-08:00

With Christmas rapidly approaching I was beginning to grow worried. Not about which gifts to buy or whether I should listen to Nat King Cole or the Rat Pack Christmas, but rather, if I was going to miss Christmas altogether.

About a week ago I had just about resolved myself to letting it pass me by without a thought.

For perhaps the first time in my life I was tired of Christmas.

You see, for about three weeks straight I worked non-stop on putting together this Christmas festival, and by the end of it I was ready for it ALL to be over. But then I realized I would be missing out. So for the last week I have been doing everything I can to completely inundate myself with everything Christmas. I have been blasting myself with Christmas music non-stop, and trying to watch a lot of my favorite Christmas movies (tonight its "Home Alone", which comically enough I wasn't really allowed to watch as a child, and this didn't really become a "classic Christmas tradition" until college).

At first I was scared. Since nothing of what I have known to be Christmas exists right now (family, friends, cold weather), I wasn't sure how I was going to achieve that "Christmas feeling". I started to feel sorry for myself. But I refused to let sadness happen. Instead, I am working to establish all new Christmas memories and feelings, so that when next year roles around, I will have something to reminisce about.

Still, it is going to be pretty weird spending Christmas somewhere other than at home with my family. You may be wondering why I won't be home for Christmas, so let me explain. We 4 Christmas Eve services at Mount Pisgah, 1 of which occurs at 11 pm. So, were I to want to drive home I would have to start the 12+ hour trek at about 1 in the morning. Then, since I have to be at work on Thursday (I haven't aquired enough PTO days to take one off yet), I would have to turn around the day after Christmas and drive another 12+ hours. I love my family, but they love me more and are quite understanding of the impracticality of this. But fortunately, God has blessed me with other options. I am going to Oxford, Alabama to spend Christmas with my dear friend Jody and his family, which I am really looking forward to.

So Merry Christmas to you all, and remember that Christmas is not about family. It's about Jesus, and you can celebrate Him wherever you are at anytime.

Number 9: "7 levels later, its time for Purgatory"

2007-12-17T11:17:00.000-08:00

I finally found myself out of Hell.

Ironically, the Hell I speak is the Christmas festival I have been working on for the last three weeks. The final show was last night, and after striking the stage last night and this morning, I am done! Now maybe I can actually enjoy the Christmas season instead of dreading it. Also, I am pretty excited about getting out and exploring the city of Atlanta.

I should be posting some new videos soon, so check back for updates.

Number 8: "It's all just running together"

2007-12-11T16:41:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I was at the church from 9am to 1am. For those of you bad with time or math, that would be a 16 hour work day. It was one of those days that was so long I couldn't remember if the things I had done that morning had actually happened then or on a different day.

The reason for these arduous hours: we are setting up the stage for the North Atlanta Christmas Festival, the giant Christmas show that spans three nights. If I knew anyone in the Atlanta area I would invite them to come either this Friday, Saturday, or Sunday night at 7:00, but no one reading this is even remotely close to the area, so it would be pointless.

In random news:

Today as I was coming back from lunch at my apartment a car pulled up next to me and the gentleman in the car motioned for me to roll down my window. The conversation that ensued went a little something like this:

Gentleman: Hey, are you from Oklahoma?
Me: Yeah.
Gentleman: I saw you licenses plate. Where in Oklahoma? I'm from there too.
Me: Tulsa. Where are you from?
Gentleman: Hey, I lived up in north Tulsa! Moved here 12 years ago.
Me: Really!
Gentleman: Yeah, I went to Booker T. Washington.
Me: Really, that's where I went to high school!
Gentleman: Where do you live?
Me: Down at Jefferson.
Gentleman: Me too! I'll have to hook up with you!

And then he had to go because the guy behind him started to honk.

So that is incredible. That or this guy has done some amazing research on my life and is going to perform an elaborate con on me. I'm kind of hoping that this is the case because that would mean I was important enough to con. This guy, if he is a con man, is going to be pretty disappointed to discover that really the only thing I have is a lot of debt.

Mount Pisgah UMC Christmas Eve Ad

2007-12-06T16:36:00.001-08:00

This isn't the video I promised you the other day, but this one is better anyway. Its my second try at editing with "Motion", though it is similar to After Effects, so the learning curve was real easy.

I made another video last night, but I probably won't post it, since my mother reads this and she would probably think something was wrong with me after seeing it. Its just a little creepy video I made in a fit of weird inspiration. Ah, what the heck, here ya go. But don't go expecting two videos per post on a regular basis.

Again, for my mother's sake, there is nothing wrong with me. I was just really bored last night.

And for those reading this on facebook, click here to see the videos.

Number 7: "Well that was just superbad."

2007-12-05T07:23:00.001-08:00

Its that time of the year again, a time of joy and family and end-of-the-year lists. To start things off for me I decided to do my least favorite movies of the year, those that I deem "Superbad". I chose to start with this because of the superbad stretch of movies I have been subjected to, which is unfortunate because this is supposed to be Oscar-worthy season.

Oh, and I must preface this list by saying that not all of these movies were released this year, rather they were all movie's I saw in 2007. Needless to say, a superbad movie is still superbad, regardless of its release date.

Superbad Movie #1: "Superbad"

It only seems appropriate to start the "Suberbad Movie List" with the movie that inspired the name. Plus, it's awfulness is fresh in my mind since I just suffered through it last night.

Reasons for Superbadness: I hate nothing more that a comedy full of crass language and sickeningly sexually perverse dialogue. Oh look, I just described this movie. I really do think that the writers of this movie (hmmm, "writer" is giving too much credit where it is not due at all; let's try "idiots".) thought to themselves, "How can we make a movie with no plot but more language and crudeness that ever before? Oh, I know! Let's steal an idea from an already superbad movie, "Revenge of the Nerds", and make it even worse!"

Most Disappointing Aspect: It really made me sad to see that Michael Cera, the hysterical "George Michael"of "Arrested Development, had a starring role. Seriously, I thought he had a better grasp on comedy than this. Not only was he not funny, when I tried to watch Arrested Development later that night every time he came on the screen he just kind of pissed me off. Hopefully he will redeem himself in the upcoming movie "Juno", who's previews made me laugh out loud.

Superbad Movie #2: "An Inconvenient Truth"

Again, I realize that this movie came out quite a while ago, but it is still talked about on a regular basis. I want to preface this editorial by making clear that my distaste for this superbad movie has nothing to do with my political leanings or personal feelings toward Al Gore. Some people love this movie because they love Al Gore, and some people hate this movie because they hate Al Gore. I hate this movie for reasons much greater than that.

Reasons for Superbadness: I don't care what political party you subscribe to or which politician you voted for, just consider this: Al Gore is not a scientist! This is possibly the most important thing people fail to realize when watching this documentary. And another very important thing to remember: anytime Hollywood produces a documentary it is going to be horribly biased and deceptively un-informing. Al Gore makes lofty claims that "there is not a single scientist out there who disagrees that global warming is an eminent threat." Really, Al, then why is it that soon after "An Inconvenient Truth" was released the BBC found several scientist willing to dispute your claims?

Most Disappointing Aspect: This movie is not about global warming. I realize that it looks that way, but if you pay close attention, this movie is really about Al Gore. Why else would he put an entire 15 minute section about the 2000 election in the middle of the movie?

Superbad Movie #3: "The Invisible"

Some people really liked this movie, but I fail to see why. Maybe they just like a movie full of plot holes, awful writing, and terrible acting.

Reasons for Superbadness: Please, allow me to elaborate on the aforementioned list of qualities:

Plot holes: The main character learns that he cannot interact with the alive world no mater how hard he tries. But then the writers thought, "Oh crap, how is this guy going to solve his own crime if he can't affect anything?" So then, without explanation or reason, he is able to interact with animals. But since animals can't talk, that really didn't get them very far. Enter unexplained random real world manipulation 2: Soon he is able to communicate to and eventually communicate with the girl that tried to kill him. And furthermore, how in the world did the investigator figure out that the main character was in the woods. While randomly walking down the road he sees a piece of car and randomly figures out that this is the crime scene.
Awful Writing: The writers, in an attempt to appeal to MTV youth, no doubt, filled the script with hysterically cliche "emo" poetry so as to convince us that the main character was this brilliant artistic writer. Quite comically, however, the writers actually wrote a scene ridiculing their own writing. There is a scene near the beginning of the movie when the class is discussing one of the main characters poems in which various comments arise about it being pretentious, stupid, and not making any sense. Like the writing in this movie.
Terrible Acting: Was I supposed to believe the character of the crazy girl? In one scene she has a good heart and tries to show it by taking care of her "somehow unaffected by his horrible surroundings" brother, but then in the next scene she is threatening to slit someone's throat. And the best friend? Am I supposed to feel sorry for him? All he did was make me want to laugh.

Most Disappointing Aspect: This movie had some incredible cinematography, as well as some shots that were really inventive. I particularly enjoyed when the main character would so something to affect the environment, and then without cutting they would pan back to him, and then back to the corrected scene. But none of this could save this superbad movie.

Superbad Movie #4: "Deja Vu"

Hollywood needs to know something: Stop making generic time travel movie's. They all unravel in the same way, and the logic all breaks down in the same manner. You cannot change the past with altering every aspect of the future!

Reasons for Superbadness: Aside from the aforementioned stereotypical flaw, it just wasn't a good movie. This has much to do with expectations, considering that Denzel Washington, who usually picks decent roles, was the star, and the previews made this movie look legitimate. But it wasn't. The story wasn't compelling, the acting was unbelievable, and it was an overall unmemorable experience. Well, I guess it was memorable enough to know that it was bad.

Most Disappointing Aspect: Several years ago I produced a short film entitled "Deja Vu", which was actually pretty good. Granted I did it for camp, so the production quality was awful, but the story was really cool. Maybe if I find it I will post it so you can know how much better than Hollywood I am.

And finally...

The Ultimate Superbad Movie: "Mr. Brooks"

Through and through this is one of the worst movies I have ever seen. No really, I couldn't wait for the end of the year just so I could make a list of bad movies just so I could put this at the top. It really is that bad.

Reason it is the Ultimate Superbad Movie: Normally when I go to a movie without expectations, as I did with this one, it turns out out better than if I had gone into it with expectations. With "Mr. Brooks", however, this was far from the case. Had I actually gone into this movie with the following expectations, things may have been better:

Dane Cook is an awful comedian and an even worse "serious actor" so don't expect anything but a lousy performance from him.
Kevin Costner is an awful actor and an even worse writer/director, so don't expect anything but a lousy performance and script from him.
Demi Moore is an awful leading lady and even worse supporting lady, so don't expect anything but a lousy performance from her.
William Hurt is an awful voice of reason and an even worse "killer personality", so don't expect anything but a lousy performance from him.

A perfect example of how miserably written and executed this movie was: I showed up 20 minutes late to this movie and still didn't miss anything. Talk about a shallow plot and characters.

Most Disappointing Aspect: There are actually people out there that think this is a poignant movie! I read a review on Rottentomatoes.com that praised the movie for its "unique look at human nature and duality". Unbelievable! It is one thing, though still hard to fathom, for someone to find entertainment value in this film, but to suggest that it is making this grand philosophical statement, are you kidding me?

So there it is. I am sure many of you out there disagree with me, so don't be afraid to speak your thoughts. Just realize this, you had better present a pretty good case (in other words, something other than, "How could you not like that movie, it was awesome!") in which you explain your reason for really liking the movie.

I'll have my favorite movies of the year soon.

Number 6: "I am going on tour"

2007-11-29T14:14:00.001-08:00

I feel as though it is important to point out that everything in this video is backwards, considering that the computer takes a mirror image shot. This will answer the question that was running through your head while watching the video, "That's weird, why do all of his doors open from the left? Hmmm, it must be an eastern time zone thing."

I hope you are enjoying the videos, and I hope to start doing some fancier things, which would make sense, since that is my profession, after all.

And now for a beautiful segue:

Speaking of video work, I finished my first (paid) project for Mount Pisgah. It's a 20 second in-house advertisement for the North Atlanta Christmas Festival (NACF), that I will hopefully put up on here sometime soon. I spent about 15 hours on it, though it may not look as though that is the case, considering I was trying to learn the editing program (Motion, for anyone out there who might know what that is) at the same time.

Oh, and by the way, those of you reading this on Facebook wondering, "He said there was video, but I don't see it. Where is it? Hmm, it must be an eastern time zone thing.", just click up at the top of the note where it says in little blue letters "View original post." That will take you to my blog, where you can watch said video.

Alright, so pending any legal constituents barring me from posting my projects for the church on a personal site, I'll get that video up on here in the next couple of days.

Number 5: "A video a day gets you a visit to the eye doctor"

2007-11-27T19:55:00.000-08:00

Great video, huh? Now I don't even have to write anymore because I can just say it and upload the video. Nah, I appreciate the look and feel of text too much, even if it is not on paper but a glaring bright white computer screen.

So over the past couple of days I have encountered a mental crisis that I hardly expected. It is nothing of serious consequence, but rather something of a seemingly trivial nature. You see, since I moved here to Atlanta I have found it increasingly difficult to listen to music. It is not a result of a lack of resource, no I have multiple avenues with which to facilitate, but rather a lack of desire. Today I sat scrolling through my Itunes library, an unnecessarily large amount of music (nearly 15 GB; believe me, I feel guilty for using so much and have made a commitment to start giving memory to the needy), for nearly half an hour, debating on what to listen to. But nothing suited my fancy.

This is where the problem lies: everything I own was purchased in Oklahoma, amongst friends, family, enemies, lovers, haters, and skaters, so it all carries with it these emotional ties. Eventually these ties will be necessary, so that I can listen to songs and reminisce and remember the good ol' days with you, but I have tried very hard to make myself emotionally apathetic for the time being. As unreasonable as that may sound, you will soon understand that it is best for me to do so.

I love the people and places back in Oklahoma, but I am not there right now. I am in Atlanta, and that is where my head needs to be. I will never be able to grow to love where I am at now, the people and the church and my new apartment, if I try desperately to hold onto the past. That would only drive me into depression, and I do very good work when I am depressed.

Please don't read this as my way of communicating that I don't want to talk to you anymore. That is not the case at all, and in fact I really do appreciate hearing a familiar voice.

Number 4: "Home sweet apartment"

2007-11-26T16:44:00.000-08:00

I am an official resident of Georgia. Hotlanta, GA. Well, Alpharetta actually, but other than those who live in the Atlanta area, it means nothing to the outsider. Just know that it is about 20 minutes north of the central city.

I signed the lease to an apartment today; kinda scary. I have never spent this much money on a place of residence (700/mo, which is remarkably cheap for this area), so signing a contract stating that should I opt out of my lease before it expires I owe someone a lot of cancellation fees. Fortunately this apartment is really nice.

Oh, you want to hear about the details, eh? Divulge...

850+ sq/ft
Sunroom
Fireplace
All electric (Seriously, no gas? That alone makes this place worth it)
Hunter green accent wall

Now, if you are like me, you are wondering what an accent wall is. When I was talking to the managers of the complex and they were giving me options for amenities they raved on and on about the fact that this particular unit (B712) had an accent wall. They literally must have mentioned this fact 4 or 5 times is the span of 10 minutes. So then Mercedes (the woman, who had a New York accent strangely enough, dedicated to finding me the best deal) takes me for a tour of the unit, and I've totally built up in my mind that there is this awesome wall that people are willing to pay extra money for, and then she shows me the wall in which she is all too excited about, and it turns out to be...

A green wall.

Ah, so that is what an accent wall is. While all the other walls are painted white, this one is painted hunter green. Huh. So she excitedly asks me, "Isn't that great?", to which I respond as sincerely as I can," Uh, yeah, that's real nice."

So if you come to visit me, which I strongly advise, I will show you my green wall and bare floors and empty bedrooms.

Tell ya what, I'll take pictures and post them and then you don't have to try and imagine, thus further pulling you away from your precious childhood.

Number 3: "And So the Journey Begins..."

2007-11-25T09:12:00.000-08:00

On Friday I said goodbye to pretty much everything I know.

That was weird.

Not necessarily sad, though part of me was, but just weird to finally be taking such a big step towards the ubiquitous "Future" . I am not sure why the "Future" is insisting that I travel 12 hours away from my world, but fate cannot be fought, and so here I am in the ATL.

The 12+ hour car ride was only slightly irritable. but that was mainly due to the slight virus I was fighting. So other than feeling achy most of the way, boredom was my nemesis. Fortunately NPR was there to keep me company most of the way, and as a result of listening to it for 8 hours, I am now hooked. Things I learned on NPR:
1. There is a scientific awards show, the Ignobel awards, honoring scientist who have acheived something that, first, makes people laugh, and then, makes people think. One woman won an award for figuring out how to extract the chemical vanillian, used to make vanilla flavor, from cow dung.
2. Nicholas Sparks wrote a new book about a 16 year old skater who learns he is going to be a father. I have never read a Nicholas Sparks book, but I doubt this one will resign me to doing so.
3. You can't freeze a pumpkin pie.
4. People in Mississippi make ornaments out of sweetgum balls. Well, they probably do this throughout the south, but I was listening to a horticulturalist from the state talk about things to do with nature.

In other news, in about 20 minutes I will be heading over to the apartment complex I hope to live in to fill out an application. Hopefully I will be able to move in tomorrow so I can settle as quickly as possible, especially considering that I start work tomorrow.

Number 2: "Could I please have my nickle back?"

2007-11-19T08:25:00.001-08:00

"No but really, could I please have my money back?"

I hope that this is the statement being uttered by anyone who has ever accidentally or, unfortunately, intentionally purchased the Nickleback album.

Why do I loathe thee so? Let me count the ways...

First off, let me clarify something. Early I stated "intentionally purchased the Nickleback..." to which you might respond, "But there are several Nickleback albums. In fact I own them all," to which I would respond, "Oh, so you really have fallen victim to their genius?"

Allow me to elaborate:

In 2001 this Canadian rock band found its way onto the American Top 100 charts with their "smash" hit "How You Remind Me", a song about, well, I'll just let lead singer Chad tell you:

it's not like you didn't know that
I said I love you and I swear I still do
And it must have been so bad
Cause living with me must have damn near killed you

And this is how, you remind me
Of what I really am
This is how, you remind me
Of what I really am

Hmm. Poignant.

But the briliance did not stop there. No, I had hardly just begun. Understanding just how little effort it takes to trick the minds of the general music listening population, Nickleback pulled one of the greatest cons in the history of music by releasing 3 more albums, all of which consisted of the same song! It's true!

But if that's not amazing, listen to this. Even though they recorded the same song over and over again (with different lyrics to throw you off their tracks), the song not only didn't get better, it got worse! Let me give you the greatest example of the greatest debacle in lyrical history:

Look at this photograph
Everytime I do it makes me laugh
How did our eyes get so red
And what the hell is on Joey's head

And this is where I grew up
I think the present owner fixed it up
I never knew we'd ever went without
The second floor is hard for sneaking out

And this is where I went to school
Most of the time had better things to do
Criminal record says I broke in twice
I must have done it half a dozen times

I wonder if it's too late
Should i go back and try to graduate
Life's better now then it was back then
If I was them I wouldn't let me in

Oh, oh, oh
Oh, god

Oh god is right.

You want to know how Nickelback got their name? From Wikipedia.com:

The band's name originates from the nickel in change that band member Mike Kroeger often had to give customers in his previous job at Starbucks, and would frequently say "Here's your nickel back".

No wonder they just won an American Music Award for best Rock band.

Number 1: "Why Don't We All Jump Onto the Bandwagon?"

2007-11-16T13:23:00.001-08:00

In an effort to keep the most amount of people up-to-date with the ever-so-important happenings of my so-called-life, I have decided to jump on the blog bandwagon. Suffice it to say, I doubt I will ever say anything of great importance on here, or that I expect anyone to ever read this, but I will naively, nay, ignorantly live under the blissful impression that someone, somewhere out there, is reading this and it is revolutionizing their life. Said revolutionized reader will be so captivated by my musings that they will one day write a national best selling self-help book in which they will dedicate the book to my memory.

I hope all of this is reading incredibly pretentious. If not, hopefully this next sentence will push it over the edge, thanks to unreasonably large words and haughty statements:

I am currently listening to opera, consuming a strong cup of "italian-roast-french-pressed" coffee, and contemplating my future existence in a land foreign to me, known as Atlanta.

Oh yes, I think that will do it. Lets see how many "Pretentious Points (PP)" I just scored on this post:

1 PP: Lots of dashes in the opening sentence.
1 PP: Saying "nay"
3 PP: Trying to be ironic by saying "I hope all of this is reading..."
1 PP: Using the word "haughty" instead of "prideful".
2 PP: Listening to opera, a genre of music lost to most people of my generation.
5 PP: Not only drinking french pressed coffee, but letting everyone know I do so.
3 PP: Saying something really existential about contemplating my future.
10 PP: Coming up with a "Pretentious Points" scorecard.
Total PP: 26

I think 26 is a pretty good number, though I am not sure what that is out of. Hopefully I can beat that next post.